Thursday, January 12, 2006

avatar attitude

i had an interesting discussion with one of my forum friends today. it seems that both of us have major avatar issues. let me explain.

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i started out as mahna mahna (do do, do do do!). the only problem with him (and it was a minor one) was that people regularly mistook me for a guy. i wanted to switch to a girly picture to throw a wrench into everyone's mental image. that's fun.

so i changed to the bespecled, purple-haired fashion doll you see on my profile. a friend of mine made it for me after i dyed my hair. i like it. but the problem with hair-product barbie here is that she thinks she's like, sooooooo much better than everyone else. just look at her... what an intellectual snob. and oddly enough, my posts became more intelligent and feminine with that avatar. strange...

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yesterday out of the blue i switched to godzilla breathing fire all over downtown tokyo. it's an awesome pic, and is a lot more popular with the other forumers than barbie or the muppets, but it stressed me out because it just didn't feel right. i felt rather violent! this was weird!

maybe a person's computer self is a different person from who they are in mind... like some other personality being created. and people (even the creator, maybe even especially the creator) start to think of their digital selves, their "projected image" (a la the matrix) the way they appear on the screen. then, when something is changed its like a different actor playing the same part in a movie sequel... it's just off. my buddy was having the same issues.

anyway, i couldn't take it anymore. i'm back to mahna mahna now. and boy do i feel relieved.

psychology is so weird.

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