Thursday, November 11, 2004

interpretation, please?

i had the weirdest dream last night.

first of all, a little bit about last night. jess was reading in bed and i was reading on the couch. i really wanted to finish the chapter, but my eyes were getting really heavy and i thought that i'd just rest them for a minute. i never thought i could fall asleep on that little tiny couch. i woke up about seven hours later because jess had rolled over and knocked something on the floor. i was shocked, really shocked to find myself still on that little couch, with the light still on, the book still on my lap, and my finger still marking my page, no less! this is very unusual because i am not a very sound sleeper. jess was telling me today that she hadn't slept so well in a long time... maybe it was something in the air.

it was after i actually got into bed that i had the dream. i went to a little christian high school, and we'd have like mini-church services in the middle of the week. i dreamed i was practicing a skit for one of those. in the skit one older person was paired with a kid, and i was paired with this cute little black girl named ruby. ruby does not actually exist, as far as i know. my little brother was in it too, and his partner was mike. in the skit, the older person would be like a voice in the kid's head, telling him or her to do something bad like steal a cookie or tell a lie. of course the voice starts to win over, until the kid prays for strength. then the voice sounds like, "blah blah blah blah...." and the kid has no trouble doing the right thing. cute, huh?

and suddenly it wasn't a skit anymore, and we were outside, standing on a really steep, rocky hill. instead of a skit it was a movie, and we had to make sure we were standing in the same place in every shot. i remember that everybody was wearing really nice running shoes except for my little brother, who got himself onto some part of the hill that he couldn't get down from and was scared. while mike and the camera guys were trying to help him, i started running down the hill and sliding on the rocks. i really remember this part well. i would slide on my feet, and slow myself down by sticking my foot further into the gravel i was sliding on. it felt like i was surfing. i was thinking, wow, all my life i thought this was so dangerous, but it's really easy. ruby said that i looked cool, and she wished that she could do it. there was some other guy there too, that said i was really cool because i wasn't worried about falling. so i climbed up the hill and did it again. i wanted my brother to see so he wouldn't be scared. this time, when i got to the bottom, i just kept running. my shoes really were nice.

i went to an underground tunnel that was halfway full of water. it wasn't dark, and the tunnel was perfectly rectangular and the walls were white. it had arms branching off to the sides, like a hallway. i had been there before and i knew i was afraid of the place. i think i was afraid that it would fill all the way and i would drown, but i had to go in anyway. i was swimming and looking at things under the water. i saw a shark about as big as a dog at one of the branches, and i didn't know what to do. i stared at it for a long time, and then i realized that it was dead. i looked ahead in the hallway and there were more dead sharks, more than i could count, and they were all moving with the water. i thought they had drowned, and that i was going to drown too. and then i remember that we were all on an island, and that we all came on a boat and that we were trying to get away from the sharks and they died in the tunnel, but we got away.

all this time the tunnel was shrinking in both directions. everytime i noticed it, the height and the width were shorter. the water was coming infrom the end of the hallway and that's where the most sharks were. the water was rough there, and i knew i had to go over there and do something that i was afraid of.

and then this guy showed up! the one that was on the hill. he had followed me, and he was asking me why i was afraid of the hallway but i wasn't afraid to slide down the mountain. and he was saying that it was really hard to get to the island in the boats and how all the sharks almost killed us. he wanted to leave, because he didn't want me to be scared, so i said that i would go with him. i was thinking in my head that i would just come back when he wasn't around, because there was something i really needed to do. the tunnel was so little now that there was no room to stand up. we swam up out of the tunnel, and then i recognized the guy! i've seen him on tv, he's on a show i watch a lot. and then i woke up.

isn't that bizarre? the whole dream i was really calm. i don't think i had any emotions at all. and sometime at the end of the dream i was thinking that ruby was my daughter, and that her name was ruby joy, and that i taught her how to spell her name.

i think i should send this into a psychiatrist. how mind-boggling.

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