Friday, May 19, 2006

tim and me

josh is moving to seattle, so this week is sort of like us catching up on all the stuff we were supposed to do in the last four years that we never did. example: every bloody time i go to his house to watch a movie i suggest sleepy hollow, but there's always some reason to pick something else. it's to bright outside. one of us is too tired. my little brother was even there once and we didn't want to freak him out. after about two years of disappointment, i finally saw it last night for the first time.

...and the last time. tim burton is a psycho freak.

how many times in one movie can you have blood splash into a character's face? i mean, there was a lot, a lot of blood. and it was gross. he even tries to fool you by making everything that's NOT blood sort of look like blood, so it still freaks you out. and i think red is the only color in the movie, because he purposely washed everything else out, which is a cool effect until there's blood in somebody's face, at which point it's just gross. weirdo. there's even one part where this woman sort of pops out of a coffin along with a flood of blood, which sort of reminded me of the shining, but... eww...

my friends were surprised that i reacted thus. they told me, "well, of course tim burton is a freak. just look at the corpse bride." i do not understand this. i love the corpse bride, it was dark and fun and sweet and romantic, and it is one of my favorite movies. in fact, it was the corpse bride that was in my head when the headless horseman in sleepy hollow was about to kill some cute little boy, and i thought, "johnny depp will save him. tim burton, maker of the corpse bride, would not let a little kid die."

i was wrong.

tim, i think we lost something. i used to like you a lot, especially since you seem partial to mr. depp and mr. lee and mr. walken, and of course your lovely fiancee, and i like being friends by association.

but you're scary, and not in a fun way. in a disturbing way.

2 comments:

CC said...

Aw, cut the guy some slack. He was trying his hand at a horror movie, and horror is one of those genres that's really hard to direct, because not only do you have to come up with a genuinely scary premise (which is getting harder and harder as audiences get more sophisticated), but you also have to decide what scare level you're going to present it at. You can't please everyone, because no matter what you do, there will be people who think you "wussed out" and others who think you "crossed the line." All you can do is try to present the story effectively and hope a lot of people like it.

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